Oaklandish
It was hot today.
I thought summer was gone, but it came back to remind me of shorts and flip flops. It felt good to feel the heat again. I like summer nights the best. Indian Summer's one the best parts of living in the Bay Area.
A lot of new changes, but the biggest one is that I've moved out of the house and I'm living in East Oakland now. It's been a long time coming (moving out) and I'm greatful for the freedom and space that it provides for me. I feel like I'm healther now. My neighborhood (I guess I can say it's mine now) is an intersesting place and I'll have to write more about my feelings towards it. For now, I'm just a stranger that lives here. Hopefully soon I'll be part of the community through deeper relationships, barbeques, art collaborations, and basketball. There's a relief that comes from being able to dream again.
There's a long story to it, but to make it short, my financial situation is starting to square up again. I guess things worked out with my money from last year holding over for my 2 month unemployment stint. It's good that I didn't buy a car even though I'll probably need to buy some wheels if I'm going to try to keep this lifestyle up. Up to this week, I'd been going to school and also working part time at a screen-printing shop. Just this week, I've started as the tutoring coordinator for New Hope's After School Tutoring program.
It's been kind of crazy trying to juggle 2 part time jobs and school. The hardest part is that I like all of it. As I step back, it's crazy, but when I'm doing it, it's my life. My loneliness has taken somewhat of a backseat to all of this activity. It's good to keep moving and not dwell on being alone. When I do take a moment to think about it, I guess I just don't really have any answers. I mean, I still wish I had more friends - especially guys my age interested in the whole urban living / community building lifestyle. But what can I really do about that? Thinking makes me feel like a loser, and that's just lame because it's a downward spiral of despair. All my 'close' friends live far away in Canada, San Diego, Atlanta, Los Angeles, etc. The sooner I get over it, and come to a point where I enjoy who I am where I am, the closer I come to really living.
I may not understand the mystery of my life but maybe I can begin living it.
I thought summer was gone, but it came back to remind me of shorts and flip flops. It felt good to feel the heat again. I like summer nights the best. Indian Summer's one the best parts of living in the Bay Area.
A lot of new changes, but the biggest one is that I've moved out of the house and I'm living in East Oakland now. It's been a long time coming (moving out) and I'm greatful for the freedom and space that it provides for me. I feel like I'm healther now. My neighborhood (I guess I can say it's mine now) is an intersesting place and I'll have to write more about my feelings towards it. For now, I'm just a stranger that lives here. Hopefully soon I'll be part of the community through deeper relationships, barbeques, art collaborations, and basketball. There's a relief that comes from being able to dream again.
There's a long story to it, but to make it short, my financial situation is starting to square up again. I guess things worked out with my money from last year holding over for my 2 month unemployment stint. It's good that I didn't buy a car even though I'll probably need to buy some wheels if I'm going to try to keep this lifestyle up. Up to this week, I'd been going to school and also working part time at a screen-printing shop. Just this week, I've started as the tutoring coordinator for New Hope's After School Tutoring program.
It's been kind of crazy trying to juggle 2 part time jobs and school. The hardest part is that I like all of it. As I step back, it's crazy, but when I'm doing it, it's my life. My loneliness has taken somewhat of a backseat to all of this activity. It's good to keep moving and not dwell on being alone. When I do take a moment to think about it, I guess I just don't really have any answers. I mean, I still wish I had more friends - especially guys my age interested in the whole urban living / community building lifestyle. But what can I really do about that? Thinking makes me feel like a loser, and that's just lame because it's a downward spiral of despair. All my 'close' friends live far away in Canada, San Diego, Atlanta, Los Angeles, etc. The sooner I get over it, and come to a point where I enjoy who I am where I am, the closer I come to really living.
I may not understand the mystery of my life but maybe I can begin living it.
posted by chia at 9:13 PM
1 Comments:
sup bro. thats what i've discovered about life recently. sometimes if we're sitting idle too long... we simply think too much for our own good. but as we're caught up in the things that life offers... it indeed is good. we feel alive. and yes, loneliness takes a back seat. keep on enjoying what life has to offer bro. i'm trying to do the same.
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